An Ode To My Slow-Cooker

Oh my slow-cooker
You were such a nice gift
By helping me cook lentils
You help me live a life of thrift.

Oh my slow-cooker
You are so freakin' sweet
Add water in the morning
When I come back, there's food to eat.

Oh my slow-cooker
You neither overboil
Nor leave those stains on my stove
'Cause I would never stir often enough, and dal goo would run out of the sides of the pot, and leave those stains that kind of looked like foam but were actually really hard and required me to scrub at my range top with a sponge which really was too much work and (oh wait, I've got it) toil.

And you make the dal have such a lovely soft texture...
Yum.