Monday, September 17, 2007

Coach Blue's Motivational Speech

If this were a Bollywood film, this speech would come right before the intermission. ^__^ I'll try to see how much of it I can remember verbatim.

"Team. Everyone be quiet and listen to me. Are we ready? Good.

From the time I called "places for Act One" to this moment, now, when we are finally in our places and silent and ready to begin, it has been ten minutes. Ten minutes. We do not have that time to waste.

We have sixteen rehearsals left. Sixteen rehearsals and then we perform. And do you know what will happen when we perform? People will laugh at you. People will laugh at this department. Already this department is getting the worst of everything, leaky roof, all of that. But maybe you students deserve it.

Do you know what they say about theatre people? That they are stupid. Do you want people to think that about you? Oh, these theatre people, they are so stupid. They don't know mathematics, they don't know engineering, they don't know science. All they know is this acting thing, and even that they do badly.

I will not make this a good play. All I do is say "move here, move there, speak louder." The rest has to come from you. It is not coming from you right now. You are not focusing on the hard work that needs to be done. You are not thinking about how to make yourself better.

We are going to begin our act run now. When you are not directly in a scene, I want you to sit and think about your performance and think about what you can do to make it better. And then when you come back onstage, I want you to do it."

Intermission. Y'all can go get your samosas now.


Daniel said...

It's like that scene in every inspirational movie wherein the coach/teacher/person in charge breaks everyone down--and then the montage happens with some insiprational music, and then...voila, a wonderful performance that wins the trophy/gets them to the championship/succeeds in some way.

Sister Act 1 & 2, Akeelah and the Bee, A League of Their Own, et al. It's found its way into real life!

Oh, and just fyi, those of us in Science (at least those of us with any bit of brains) don't look down on actors (well, maybe the starving ones who become waiters just to survive, but that's only because they suck at being waiters and should stick with acting.) We do look down on athletes, however. Oh, and cheerleaders. And Marketing majors, ...

Oh hell, everyone looks down on everyone else. Mathematicians look down on physicists who in turn look down on chemists. Chemists despise biologists and biologists think they're better than psychologists and sociologists. It's a vicious cycle. Of hate.

Yeah. I'm rambling. :) Bye!

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