Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The Toilet Museum Is A Piece Of... Oh, Never Mind.

A commenter on an earlier post suggested that I look up IndiaMike for tips and help.

I'm fairly familiar with IndiaMike, and have, in the past, scavenged their website for those very things.

I don't want to be mean about it, so I won't. But I think IndiaMike and I have different tastes.

IndiaMike said Sleeper II was the best way to travel, so I booked Sleeper II...
IndiaMike said the Star Palace hotel was a great deal, so I booked Star Palace...
And IndiaMike highly recommended the International Toilet Museum, so I went.

DON'T GO. If you're in Delhi, just don't go. DON'T EVER GO!!!!!!!!

For starters, it's in Dworka Sector. I don't know what that means, exactly, but it sounds like something from Star Wars and takes about an hour to get to by metro.

Once I arrived, I found another cycle rickshaw who said he knew how to get to the Toilet Museum. (BTW -- if you want to make Indian guys blush, go up to them and ask them how to get to the Toilet Museum.)

45 minutes later it became clear that he... did not.

I won't go into the details of the rest, because the clock is ticking and this internet ain't free. When I finally reached the museum, I found that it was closed for the week because they were hosting International Toilet Conference 2007.

I briefly considered trying to crash ITC 2007 (can you imagine what the seminars would be like?), but was more distracted by the sudden discovery that my camera was missing.

This was very distressing. I had the camera in its little velvet pouch, which (not fitting into my purse) had been wrapped around my wrist by the strap, multiple times.

I don't remember ever taking it out of the pouch, or off of my wrist. And I thought wrapping the straps around my wrist was a fool-proof defense, figuring it couldn't be pulled off at one go.

But there were those two people in the metro who had asked me directions to somewhere or another, which I thought was very odd, since why were they asking the white person???? They had pressed into my space, too. Which I had also thought was odd, since the metro was pretty empty.

Still, if they had, say, cut the straps, wouldn't I have felt it?

Where the hell did my camera go???????

And as I stood in front of the International Toilet Museum looking very depressed, one of the janitorial staff offered to take me on a quick tour.

It's... well, a few toilets and a lot of toilet-related humor. And although I would be the first to admit that I like toilet-related humor, don't bother.

And hang on to your cameras!

55 comments:

Fairfield County CT said...

Oh, it was I who mentioned IndiaMike. Their Kolkata selection is usually OK, but I never thought of checking their Delhi page, just lazily assumed that by extension it would be the same level. My bad! Delhi is really taxing your reserves, isn't it? Go relax and take in the fantastic modern art at the National Museum near India Gate. Original masterpieces by renowned masters like Jamini Roy and Nandlal Bose. Go see them before we get another cretinous culture minister (one of the previous incumbents wanted to actually sell some priceless pieces for "revenue", the philistine!).
Do try Dilli Haat though (near AIIMS in South Delhi, consult your guidebook). I promise you won't regret it - unless it's raining in which case you will curse me because it's all open air. It's a couple or rupees to enter and then there are all kinds of crafspeople - jewellery, etc. - selling their wares. And if you want cheap western clothes, try the Sarojini Nagar Market where they sell a bunch of export rejects fairly cheap - although they will probably hike the price for you seeing you're a foreigner.

To see (if not buy) handicrafts from all over India, visit the Central Cottage Industries Emporium in Connaught Place or different state emporia on Baba Kharak Singh Marg. They are dusty, run by the government (and hence sleepy and inefficient) but they do have a lot of variety for clothes, jewellery and crafts and little knick-knacks. The Gujarat emporium is the best. OK, warning: many of the salespeople will drive you nuts here with their slowness.

There I have sent you all over the place in different directions. Have fun!

Anonymous said...

oh no!

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:-p

Anonymous said...

I meant National Gallery (as in of Modern Art, aka Jaipur House). The National Museum is also near India Gate but on Janpath. Don't want you to take more fruitless autorickshaw rides than you have already had.

Anonymous said...

Blue,

so sorry to hear about the loss of your camera. :( That is truly a bummer...

Hope you get some Jalebis to make you feel better

Bitterlemons

Patrix said...

Of all wonderful things in Delhi, why would you want to see a Toilet Museum? :)

Vishnu said...

So sorry to hear the loss of your camera...
Being an Indian I am ashamed to see what some of my fellow countrymen (I hate to call them country men myself) do to foreigners.

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